Dating a Friend’s Ex
Logan’s close friend Alex dated Taylor for a year. When Taylor dumped Alex, Alex was devastated. Logan provided support and compassion after the breakup. But after a few months, Logan began to develop feelings for Taylor. After much thought, Logan finally worked up the courage to tell Alex. Furious, Alex told Logan that continued pursuit of the relationship with Taylor would amount to a betrayal.
Logan is no longer sure whether or not it would be ethical to pursue the relationship with Taylor. Logan sympathizes with Alex, doesn’t want to be a bad friend, and genuinely cares about Alex’s feelings. Logan is worried that dating Taylor could jeopardize a potentially life-long friendship with Alex, and this thought is deeply saddening, especially with no guarantee that the relationship with Taylor will work out. Moreover, Logan is concerned that the situation could become awkward for mutual friends, who might be put in the uncomfortable position of “picking sides” in the dispute.
On the other hand, Logan wonders whether Alex has any right to stand in the way of the budding new romance. “Does a year-long high school relationship really mean this much?” Logan wonders. It’s not as if Taylor and Alex were married. In fact, in a certain mood, Logan feels resentful of Alex, wondering whether Alex shouldn’t be glad that a close friend has the prospect of a happy relationship.
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
Is it morally permissible for Logan to pursue a relationship with Taylor? Why or why not?
How, if at all, do the characters’ genders change the moral dimensions of the case?
If Logan does pursue a relationship with Taylor, does that make Logan a “bad friend?” What constitutes a “betrayal” of a friend?
Is Alex’s reaction to the Logan/Taylor romance reasonable? Is it morally permissible?
